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The Apocryphal Press (AP) satirizes the real news. Any resemblance to real news just shows how badly it needs satirizing. All content is by Marty Smith, who is jackass enough to own up to it in public. Note that postings written before this blog's January 23, 2008 debut were back dated to their appropriate places in history, Three of them go back to 2007. Laugh if you will, cry if you must, bitch if you want to.
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The Vatican, May 14, (AP). Pope Benedict XVI announced today that he would submit the name of President George W. Bush for beatification, the first step to sainthood, after reading the news story yesterday reporting that Bush had quietly given up golf since August 2003, out of respect for the families of Americans killed in Iraq. “I don’t want some mom whose son may have recently died to see the Commander-in-Chief playing golf,” Bush said.
Explaining his decision, the Holy Father said, “He could have done some meaningless symbolic act that would cost him nothing, like improving the soldier’s equipment, or health care, or even bringing them home, but instead he chose a monumental personal sacrifice. This level of self-abnegation is on a par with the actions of Gandhi and Mother Theresa. To the best of my knowledge, neither of them ever gave up golf.”
