New York, September 17, 2008 (AP) Senator John McCain, in New York’s financial district, was seriously injured today by falling stock prices and collapsing financial institutions, but through the rubble he was heard to say “the fundamentals of the economy are sound.”
McCain was rushed to The Hospital for Disingenuous Panders, where physicians pronounced him on the mend, but psychiatrists just scratched their heads.
Mistaking a muttered remark in the emergency room, a woozy McCain rolled up his speech and tried to force it through his anal sphincter without much success. Actual treatment began at once with an intravenous mixture of reality and truth serum.
In other news, Governor Sarah Palin told the father of daughter Bristol’s fetus, “That’s not what I meant when I said drill baby, drill.”
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
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