DUELING METAPHORS DEPARTMENT:
Tea Party Lights Fuse for Rebellion on Right
OVERDONE METAPHORS DEPARTMENT:
Democrats Reel as Senator Says No to 3rd Term
MISLEADING HEADLINE DEPARTMENT:
Secret Joint Raid Captures Taliban’s Top Commander has nothing to do with marijuana cigarettes or bong hits.
REAL HEADLINES WITH IMAGINED SUBHEADS:
1. White House Invites Congressional Leaders to Summit
New Obama Aide, Pied Piper, To Push Them Off
2. Pope Urges Irish Bishops to Confront Sex Abuse
Bishops Demur, Prefer Looking Other Way While Screwing Choirboys
SAME STORY, A DIFFERENT EDITION:
Pope Meets Irish Clergy to Discuss Clergy Abuse
Clergy: “If choirboys abuse us, we forgive them.”
HEADLINES MEANT TO BE UNDERSTOOD ONLY BY INSIDERS:
1. Heavy Snow Postpones Men’s Super Combined
2. After the Cohen Debacle, a Chance to Show Skill
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