Friday, December 23, 2011

APOCRYPHAL PRESS NEWS ROUNDUP

“give a man a frying pan and he can fry a latke, give him a huge bonus and he can spend Chanukah in Hawaii.” - Goldman Sachs

Dec 23, 2011 (AP). Ron Paul withdraws twenty year old bigotry. According to a Reuters dispatch, a twenty year old fund-raising letter sent, and apparently signed, by presidential candidate Ron Paul, made appeals to racism and homophobia. Mr. Paul has now retracted those statements as urged by his son, entertainer Rue Paul.

Turkey cuts off the French. Turkey has curtailed diplomatic relations with France after its parliament passed a law making it a crime to deny the Turkish genocide of Armenians eighty or ninety years ago. Turkey said it had always been a peace loving nation and, unless the law was repealed, it would send troops to Marseille and cut off every Frenchman’s Bouillabaisse.

In a related story, House Speaker John Boehner introduced legislation to make it a crime to deny the Laffer curve.


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